So how was YOUR Valentine`s Day? Did you enjoy a few, romantic hours with your partner? Or did you spend it as any normal Tuesday? 

Talking about “romantic hours” – Do you still enjoy intimacy with your partner? Or have these sensual moments eventually been overtaken by your job, household responsibilities, commitments, or just plain tiredness?

We all know how it is: As we hit perimenopause and menopause, we start to experience all sorts of wacky changes in our bodies, emotions, and sex lives. Enter intimacy, the ultimate mixed bag of benefits and challenges!

LET’S TALK ABOUT SEX, BABY….

First off, let’s talk benefits. One major plus is that women in this phase of life may have more time for sex and may even discover new desires and preferences. Hellooo, sexual renaissance! 

Unfortunately, this is the “perfect world” …. most of us have a different reality:

Picture this: you’re a mom with kids on one side and aging parents on the other. It’s like being a human sandwich, except instead of being stuffed with cheese and veggies, you’re packed with responsibility and stress!

Juggling the demands of caregiving for both your kids and parents can leave you feeling drained, tired, and about as sexy as a loaf of bread. It’s hard to feel frisky when you’re running around like a chicken with its head cut off, trying to manage everyone’s needs while keeping your own sanity intact.

On top of that, menopause throws its own curveball into the mix. Hot flashes, night sweats, and mood swings are like the triple threat of un-sexy symptoms, leaving you feeling like a walking volcano ready to erupt at any moment.

But wait, there’s more! Hormones can cause vaginal dryness, which can make sexy time super uncomfortable. And let’s not forget the all-too-common challenge of decreased libido and difficulty reaching orgasm. Trust me, there’s nothing like spending hours trying to achieve an orgasm that’s playing hide-and-seek like Waldo.

LADIES, WE ARE NOT “OLD” WE ARE EXPERTS!!!

Of course, it doesn’t help that society has such a warped view of aging and sex. For instance, many people think that women are supposed to lose interest in sex as they get older. But why should men have all the fun, right? Meanwhile, menopause is still treated like a taboo topic, which only makes women feel more awkward about discussing their changing bodies and sexual desires. Can we please just talk about hot flashes and our favorite vibrators without getting weird looks?

All joking aside, women in perimenopause and menopause can take steps to stay sexually satisfied, even when the odds are stacked against them. 

NUTRITIONAL HELP FOR A HEALTHY LIBIDO

• Add 2-3 teaspoons of maca powder to your breakfast cereals every day as it is known for its libido-boosting benefits.
• Limit your alcohol consumption to max 6 units per week.
• Check your levels of vitamin D, Magnesium, Iron and Vitamin B12 – you might need to increase your levels with supplements
• Increase foods rich in zinc (oysters, prawns, pumpkin and sesame seeds, tahini, chickpeas, brown rice, green peas, dark chocolate, lean beef)
• Increase foods rich in copper (oysters, prawns, crab, spirulina, shiitake, dark chocolate, leafy greens).
• Limit your tea and coffee consumption.

Did you know that regular orgasms with yourself or with a partner can help to strengthen the pelvic muscles?

SPICY BOOKS TO BOOST YOUR SENSUAL IMAGINATION!

There is a lot of good, inspiring literature on female sexuality. Check out the books of Regena Thomashauer, aka “Mama Gena,” a women’s empowerment teacher who helps women embrace their desires, honor their emotions, and celebrate their bodies. She’s all about pleasure, joy, and self-expression, and her work emphasizes that confident, fulfilled, and empowered women can change the world for the better. 

Thomashauer has authored several books, including “Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts,” “Pussy: A Reclamation,” and “The School of Womanly Arts Workbook.” She has been featured in numerous media outlets, including The New York Times, The Oprah Winfrey Show, and The Today Show.

Her work has inspired thousands of women around the world to embrace your inner goddess and live your best life!

LIFESTYLE TIPS FOR A HAPPY VAGINA

We need PLEASURE! Experiencing pleasure, Nitric Oxide is released into the blood. Nitric Oxide plays a big part in lowering blood pressure, regulating heart rate, and feeling good!

• Regular exercise not only activates blood flow throughout your body, but it also stimulates your energy and motivation.
• A relaxing massage, acupuncture or reflexology can do wonders.
• If sex is painful (due to vaginal atrophy) we can use a dilator before sex. Many find that going slowly during sex helps the vaginal walls relax.
• Avoid using a vaginal douche or vaginal cleaning products containing perfumes or chemicals as they can alter the natural ph. of your skin and cause an infection.
• Be gentle when drying yourself after going to the toilet to avoid any irritation.
• Talk to your gynecologist about using estrogen gel in the vagina as this helps to strengthen the vaginal tissue and combats vaginal atrophy. 
• Apply a natural, water-based lubricant gel before having sex, to help against vaginal dryness. 
• Ayurvedic medicine recommends wearing a tampon covered with ghee for a few hours a day to strengthen the delicate skin of the vagina.
• Plan small downtimes with your partner when you are alone and undisturbed.
• Plan activities together as a couple, like a dance class, a trip, a nice dinner.
• Watch a good erotic film that gets your imagination going.

And let’s not forget that communication is key! Talking with your partner about what you like (and don’t like) in the bedroom can help make your sex life more enjoyable for both of you.

So there you have it, folks: the good, the bad, and the sweaty of intimacy during menopause. At the end of the day, women should do what makes them feel comfortable and happy in their own skin, whether that means getting busy in the bedroom or binge-watching Bridgerton with a bottle of wine – well, instead of wine, how about this nonalcoholic BUT aphrodisiac mocktail? 

Pomegranate and Ginger Fizz

Here’s a recipe for a delicious and refreshing non-alcoholic cocktail that includes some ingredients that can support sexual health and well-being during menopause:

Ingredients:

• 1 cup pomegranate juice
• 1/4 cup fresh lime juice
• 1 tbsp. honey
• 1/2 tsp. grated fresh ginger
• 1 cup sparkling water
• Ice cubes
• Pomegranate seeds and lime slices for garnish

Instructions:

In a small saucepan, combine the pomegranate juice, lime juice, honey, and grated ginger. Heat over medium heat, stirring occasionally, until the honey is dissolved and the mixture is hot.

Remove the pan from the heat and let the mixture cool to room temperature.

In a pitcher or large glass, combine the cooled pomegranate mixture and sparkling water.

Fill glasses with ice and pour the pomegranate and ginger fizz over the ice.

Garnish with pomegranate seeds and lime slices.

Enjoy the Pomegranate and Ginger Fizz as a delicious and healthy non-alcoholic cocktail that may add some extra sparkle to your intimate moments. The pomegranate juice is rich in antioxidants, while the ginger is believed to have anti-inflammatory properties and may help support healthy blood flow. The lime juice adds a refreshing citrus flavor, and the honey provides a touch of natural sweetness.

Cheers to embracing our changing bodies and making the most of what we’ve got!

Take care!

Tara